--thevesper

--thevesper

The Oboard. It's back. LOL.

Give you a rundown of what's been going on in my life... all that dirty drama good & bad & all them CW introspective feelings. I could post pictures of accidents I ended up involved in by bearing witness and heroically jumping into the fray (or stupidly) to save the day... I could cry on your shoulder, share a laugh, pun, Impart funny ironies, wisdoms, or nihilistic detached statements, or write something meaningful in any form. Instead... I post this.

Anya: "We could watch sports of some kind."
Xander: "Uh, I don't know."
Anya: "Men like sports. I'm sure of it."
Xander: "Yes, men like sports. Men watch of the action movie. They eat of the beef and enjoy to look at the bosoms."

http://thesims3.ea.com/view/pages/home.jsp
Behold it. In all it's glory. My panties are wet.
Because I peed myself in glee. You pervs.

Lumetta isn't out of the woods yet... but he made it thru the night. He had a tear in his urethra, bladder and a nicked kidney. One of the tears causing the leak was so far up the vet had to open him all the way up and insert a rubber tube in his bladder since even in human beings where the tear resided it was unreachable.

Make sure you feed your cats a diet low in ash. Good pet food can save you this stress, unfortunately Luma has a higher PH then other cats so his diet will always have to be from the vet.

Luma & Me & the menagerie thank everyone for their support during this chaotic time & we hope you keep us in your thoughts cause so far so good! If he hadn't gone into emergency surgery, if things happened the slightest bit different he'd already be gone. Literally. 1. Thing.

We still need to reverse the kidney damage...

And Luma asks if he makes it thru... that those of u who know him personally...
When he comes home & you see him... once again.

NO LAUGHING ALLOWED! or he says...

Hey
Things in my life have been crayzine so I haven't had time to update. Hope u all had a Merry Xmas!

A MeMe Survey based on Itunes (or whatever) on shuffle. Here is mine post yours!

*Itunes Shuffle Fun*
I believe in the power of the universe let's see what it says!
Put your music on shuffle and let it choose your fate.
Survey snagged from Mersi

Note: Omg the diversity on my Ipod is going to make this crazy.
1. My Make Out song? "Total Eclipse Of The Heart" - Nikki French (bad sign?)
"Once upon a time I was falling in love but now I'm only falling apart"

2. What I did last night? "In Your Eyes" - Peter Gabriel (wtf?)
"I drive off in my car but whichever way I go I come back to the place you are"

3. My deepest secret is? "Heavymetal Drummer" -Wilco (wtf!!!)
"I still miss those heavy metal bands" I rlly don't.
"I miss the innocence Ive known. Playing kiss covers. Beautiful & stoned"
Ok, maybe but not Kiss. And wtf Wilco Kiss isn't metal.

4. At my funeral they'll play? "Disarm" by The Smashing Pumpkins
Why am I not shocked? "The killer in me is the killer in you, my love, I sent this smile over to you".

5.
My last words will be? "Lost Time" - Maria Taylor
Figures. "And if it's all just luck It was tough enough"
"And a heart in need. Finds hope in anything"

6. My life is? "Bye June" - Smashing Pumpkins
"Bye, June I'm going to the moon, so June you better make it soon. I'm wishing you're there too... Bye Bye June" This fits in a creepy way. You'd have to understand the song and me in a complex way to get it, but srsly wow.

7. If I reached the top of Mt. Everest what would I scream? "Departure" - REM
"Departure, godspeed, bless his heart, good lord. What a fuck-up, what a fighter"

8. The story of my life is? "Hella Good" - No Doubt
"The waves keep on crashing on me for some reason" is the only reason this song could have possibly come up. I am ashamed my life is a No Doubt song. Wtf Ipod. Silver Traitor.

9. If I got lost on a deserted island I would yell? "Her Ghost" - Jon Brion
"Her ghost is propped up in the hall. He speaks no evil there". This song creeped me out. Even though I understand the context it reminds me of Hell Home.

10. When I'm drunk I say? "Lily My One & Only"- SP
O, I get drunk and stalk ppl? Cool!
"And thru her window shade I watch her shadow move"

11. When I'm high I say? "Slideshow" Rufus Wainwright
"Do I love you because you treat me so indifferently? Or is it the medication?" Nice!

12. My message to the world have always been? "Lonely Lonely" - Feist
This is CRAP! It is NOT! "Distance makes the heart grow weak. So that the mouth can barely speak .Except to those who hide their needs"

13. My love life was inspired by? "Lover You Should Have Come Over" - Jeff Buckley "Its never over, shes the tear that hangs inside my soul forever. Oh... lover, you shouldve come over cause its not too late."

14. This song takes me back into the days? "It's My Life" - Bon Jovi
Nice! "It's my life, it's now or never! I aint gun live forever! I just wanna live while I alive! My hart is like an open Highway!!" Oooh Ahh.

15. The song that my lover sings to me? "On The Road Again" - Willie Nelson
"On the road again. Just can't wait to get on the road again." /facepalm

16. Somewhere in my wedding vows I will include? "Beautiful Girls" - Plain White T's "Cause we both thought that love could last forever" "You got me suuiciddddaaaaal when you say goodbye" Figures.

17. My family is described by the song... "Humpty Dumpty" - Aimee Mann (wtf?) "Say you were split, you were split in fragments, and none of the pieces would talk to you"

18. This is the song that will be playing when I meet the love of my life? "Bleed" - Smashing Pumpkins. No.
"settle your belief inside of me. take someone beside you"

19. After sex I say? "Rockstar" - Jimmy Eat World
The previous would have been funnier.
"Stop giving it up now cause you're gonna find yourself a mastermind in time.
Rockstar, what's mine is yours. Rockstar, you're looking good."

20. Happiness is? a fish I can't catch. No. Let's shake the mystical ipod.
"Want More" - Carina Round
"'I've got everything that I need. Right here"

21. My inner most desire is? "Poem (Love Buzz)" - Frank O' Hara
"Can you feel my love buzz!"

22. Tomorrow my day will be like? "Oh Mandy - " The Spinto Band
"Sure I had trouble from the onset. I tried to chase things I couldn't get
Show me a rerun on the W
Show me a rerun on the WB
So What's it like to be in it?"
LOLLOLLOL

23. My friends is like? "Sunkissed" - SP
"I mistook you for a trust. Invocations I must dust off"

24. When I'm in the shower I sing? "Comfortably Numb" - Pink Floyd
"Hello Hello Hello is there anybody in there?" Nice

25. My friends see me as? "Paul" skit - Eminem
"Dre gave me a copy of the new album and it's aww fuck it"

26. My parents like the song? "Toy Soldier" - Carbon Leaf
(I highly doubt this)

27. What makes me happy is? "Savior" - Red Hot Chili Peppers
"The more I hear the orchestra
The more I have something to bring"

28. My ultimate song to dance to is? "Eye" - Sp
My Ipod is lying again.
"Is it any wonder I can't sleep?"

29. I shake my booty to? "Sad Robot" -Stars
Oh shit I haven't even heard this yet!
"My heart,  Will change from steel to dust"

30. How will you die? "Skip Divided - Thom Yorke
"Electric veins pass through me
I thought there was this big connection
I only got my name I only got the situation"
Wtf?

31. High school was like? "I Don't Want To Grow Up" - Scarjo/TomWaits
"I don't wanna grow up"


32. The song that describes my grandparents is? "Bookstore" - Jon Brion
*shrug* Instrumental

33.  The song that makes me melt is? "Drown" - SP
"Yesterday the sky was you
And I still feel the same"
Not really. It's one big Pisces inside joke.

34. The song that I sing that makes me feel like the hottest? "Too Much Booty In The Pants" I don't need to dignify it with lyrics rofl.

35. Last night I dreamed about? "Sleeps With Butterflies" - Tori Amos
"I'm not like the girls that you've known
But I believe I'm worth coming home to
Kiss away night
This girl only sleeps with butterflies
With butterflies
So go on and fly then boy"

36. My wedding song is? "Viva La Vida" - Coldplay
"I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own"
Figures.

37. This is how I feel about my lover? "Crossroad" - Cream
"I went down to the crossroad, fell down on my knees, Asked the Lord above "Have mercy, save poor Bob, if you please."

38. The meaning of love? "Rock N Roll Lifestyle" Cake
LOL
"Aging black leather and hospital bills,
Tattoo removal and dozens of pills.
Your liver pays dearly now for youthful magic moments"

39. How do you get someone into bed? "What's The Use Of Wondrin" - Amanda Palmer "Common sense may tell you that the ending will be sad
And now's the time to break and run away
But what's the use of wondering if the ending will be sad
He's your fella and you love him there's nothing more to say"

YEAH BUT HOW DO I GET LAID?

40. Right now I am? "California" - Rougue Wave
"Screw California. And friends that are never there"
Srsly.

41. I wish I wrote this song? "Kiss The Girl" - Disney LOLOLOLOLOL
SHALALALALALALA

42. When I was little my parents would sing me to sleep with this song? "Precious Things" - Tori Amos
"Yes my loyalty has turned, like my ankle in 7th grade, running after Billy. Running after the rain"

43. I wish I could? "Bleeding The Orchid" - Sp
Wtf?
"Gilded art this silent march,
Past triumph, thru alarm
So thus charmed
Does this Will stand for much?"

--thevesper

--thevesper

Mostly...

I have come to define you by the inability of being able to define you. Like a silent night with the moon hung full and low beckoning It's magic flow underneath It with the rocking pull of an Ocean temporarily shadowed.

You are museums filled with old Postcards paid for with pennies, hand stamped, and filled with words never delivered because of old wars... old revolutions that have come to pass and went at the sometimes cost of Return To Sender sent back in bulk with ribbons and sometimes medals to top the stack. As if that made up for the sentiments that died in the air before it reached the heart of those that were loved.

You are back out on the porch with a broken radio, tuning in Holiday jingles and news abroad. With the dogs... with the late night sky and a bottle of old malt scotch and musty cigarettes. You are old romance, like candle light by Holiday Trees smelling of pine and singing timeworn songs as if they were new and not unasked for tattoos of tradition.

You are the childhood I never had, you are sepia portraits of little kids manning 5 cent lemonade stands by the road and backed by an army of fruit trees swaying in the Spring, as somewhere off in the distance a violin sings with the local birds, and there is an unspoken promise that no matter what these times will always be. Somewhere...
Maybe even if just dreams.
Maybe even if just in somebody else's memories.
You are the tragedy that makes sad music sing...

You see, the trick to a beautifully sad song is not in the chords or the technique picked out for effect, but in the timing, and it's the timing that is always just perfectly delayed enough to mark that note into a feeling of something always just within my reach, but as fleeting, isolated and yet still imperviously permanent as the scars on my arms... much like the cracks from some huge earthquake, like the stretch marks of birth, and like the few times eclipse's turned a washed out afternoon into a midnight sun.

You are the miracle you never experienced... the best friend you never made, and the emptiness you never filled.  You are the far off place you never traveled... and the thing you were always meant to find but didn't.

I haven't given up on you yet... but I keep moving through the highway tunnels and busy streets at the speed that life takes me through them, never forgetting, hoping to be surprised, but not counting on anything but the amount of birds that hover over my car at stoplights.

Mostly...

I have come to define you by the inability of being able to define you, and that's quite alright... because regardless I know.

You are beautiful.

As a fleeting story that ends in sorrow, or a happy ending, either way, I got to experience you. And therefore I am for the better, changed.

If this alone is the end of the story then I will still stand and say, it was a great book. If not... then only time can speak to us. To you. To your fears and to your courage.

You are the ending to every poem or piece of prose I wish I had.